It’s been forever since I typed a blog post.
And I believe much of the reason for this is because I was taken aback by humanity. I was personally surprised at my own humanity, wondering how I had been so affected by this syndrome that seems to be terrorizing individuals day after day.
You see it when you wake up in the morning, and go out into the world with your heart bursting at its seams with joy, only to notice that those you come across don’t seem to skip in their strides like you do. They even seem distant, disoriented, half dead – their minds appearing to run in an endless cycle of worries and anxieties. And as you take a seat in your favorite coffee shop to subconsciously just refuel your drained energies from the lack of positivity around you, you slip out your phone, open up social media and see it again. It’s like no matter where you turn to or go, it stares at you mockingly – threatening to grab you by its malicious claws and cast you into your own dark abyss.
You see fear.
The people you made eye contact with are terribly afraid…Afraid of some reality coming upon them that they have seen happen to someone else, or that they frankly just imagine. So it drives them to do unusual things; the most unusual of them being to neglect the living and enjoyment of their own lives. They seem to have forgotten what it means to savor the present, and gift wrap it for the future’s present. And it’s not just the people you see in front of you, but also the people on the phone screen. Presidents creating fear within their countries and slowly making every vote to their name, seem like a memorial vote. Religious individuals who fancy themselves Christians, shoving the fear of the collapse of the world as we know it, down the throats of those who simply don’t know better yet – or rather, don’t have hope yet. A gay person in the closet, tweeting covert one liners hinting at depression, because anyone he tells his secret to will judge him. A ‘woke’ famous Twitter girl, encouraging all kinds of selfish and unloving mentalities in the heavily abused and popular name of ‘self love’.
A humanity that overall, is afraid of their Father.
In one way or another, these observable symptoms indicate a foundational reality in the minds of people. People are afraid of Love. And they will do everything in their subconscious power to sabotage the goodness they want to see in the world and in their lives, because of that fear.
And so I have decided to speak up against this fear in every form. By now you have probably realized that I haven’t used the words ‘God’, ‘Jesus’, or quoted a gazillion Scriptures to back up every thought of my free, well-functioning brain. It’s because I’m taking off my mask of Christian pretense to actually be a Christian. I am absolutely fed up with piles of Bible studies, but no heart of Jesus. Tired of seeing supposed prophets talk so much about encounters with a loving God, when their lives are constantly attempting to make a U-Turn from love. I’m tired of the epitome of Christianity being that of judgement, confused moral laws, hatred, racism, and increasing irrelevance towards a world that doesn’t care for our doctrine or arguments – but wants that unconditional love that arrogantly defies their fears.
For too long we have put up with stupid reasons why our love can’t be unconditional, but God’s can.
And that’s how humanity effs up humanity. We presume that by ‘just being human’, we are being humble and not trying to assume too much.
“God is God so only He can ever actually love the world properly back into healing”, we say.
Yet by saying this, we stray far away from what real humanity is really about. In the same breath, we refuse to ‘just be human’ and enjoy the awkwardness and mistakes in relationships, growth, and life as a whole. We want every reason to abandon our true selves – our true humanity. The one that Jesus came to remind us of. The one that is weaved into the fabric of the Trinity.
And to be fair, that type of hell is far worse than a supposed fire and brimstone compartment underneath the ground.
To live your whole life in fear and paranoia isn’t a good deal. To wake up on the other side of eternity and realize that the voice you thought was God’s was rather the accuser driving you, would be a pain that cannot be measured. To sit back and not make use of the ‘eternal life’ spoken of in John 3:16 is the ultimate hell.
So I encourage you to live. I encourage you to accept that there isn’t a disturbed bone in the body of God towards you, and His Love is far more exaggerated towards you than the wildest imagination of your wildest imagination. I encourage you to stop letting thoughts of scary future possibilities strangle words of present affirmations from your mouth. I encourage you to trust again, and make human investments that money can’t afford.
I encourage you to question every single belief that undermines the freedom of love. I encourage you to smile again, laugh again, play again, be free again. To look within and call God “Father” with the fullest assurance. To look at others, stare beyond the conditioned pain, and see the eyes of Jesus looking back at you earnestly.
I encourage you to boldly be yourself – to be truly human- and put an end to the cycle.
Let your true humanity eff up humanity.